“Let’s be honest–you can’t say fuck you at work, but you can say it if you’re fluent in corporate.

“I’m going to give you four phrases that work like a charm without getting dragged into HR. So save this video, because you’re going to need it.”

One: Thanks for your input. I’ll take it from here. That’s code for: You’ve done enough, please stop touching it now.

Two: If that’s the direction you want to go, I’ll make a note of it. Translation: I’m putting this in writing, and you can deal with the consequences later.

Three: I disagree, but happy to escalate if that’s the next step. That’s the professional version of: Try me.

Four–and this one is my personal favorite: Understood.

No follow-up, no smile, no tone. Just one word that says: I heard you, and I’m not impressed. We are done.

None of these are rude. None of these get you written up. But they all say exactly what you mean–without losing your cool.